It’s me the Author. I’m going to keep my name anonymous for now, because whether I give my name out or not, I’m just another individual that’s been dealt the same life of hurt and pain as many of you.

Gowing up wasn’t easy. Being yelled at, bullied by family, being blamed for just being me. My parents never wanted me, so they later tossed me out like their garbage.

Life doesn’t get easier the older you get; it gets more difficult. Going through life being told your nothing and then entering the world you almost know nothing about takes you for a spin and you have to learn fast. With the economy the way it is, I look around and I see everyone struggling just like myself. It’s a bad hand we have been dealt. Everyone is uneasy and unsure of what’s going to happen next. More and more people are becoming depressed or anxiety induced because they cannot afford to keep a roof over their family’s heads or are forced to choose between having food or keeping a roof over their head.

Money is a huge problem when it comes to issues in Domestic Violence situations. It was in my family growing up. When my biological father lost his job, he took his anger out of my mother. When it wasn’t about his job, he took all his other anger issues out on me. Because of him, and his attempt to control me and the lies I grew up believing (that he and my biological mother made me believe were true or disguised as true) I contemplated suicide so many times. No matter whether it was the clothes I wore, the friends I had, the music I listened to, the way I talked and walked, the tone of my voice or the loudness of my laugh…it was all too much for them and they made me feel like a burden they never wanted. They tried to keep me from most things the older I got, claimed my medical diagnosis wasn’t real, and blamed me as being their cause of every shameful thing that ever happened to them.

It really caused me a lot of confusion and loneliness. As a result I disassociated from as young as I can remember all up until my mid adult years. I contemplated ending it all often. It wasn’t that I wanted to die but I was so unsure of how I’d even manage to live knowing I could hardly ever gain enough strength and energy to make a living especially when everyone around kept taking from me. I grew up in church but I Christians hurt me more than anyone, so trying to see God in anything was nearly impossible.

Your spirituality is yours, but for my biological parents it was a “mask” they lived by and no one, not even family knew what was going on. So, I had to keep myself closed off. This is a huge reason other people who go through invisible abuse don’t talk about anything that hurts them; because no one would believe them if they did. If someone were to believe you, you'd have to be very careful how you live and talk…because living life after you get out of a negative situation like this, gets even more difficult, and that’s the time to know when it’s best to keep your mouth shut.

This is why I have created this sight. Because I know what it feels like to not want to be here but want to at the same time. “It’s never too late”. But we must keep going because we are the only ones that will believe other people stories and even see them when no one else will and will be a voice for those who have lost theirs.